When Fear gives way to Trust
Updated: Dec 3, 2020
Today I had a thought… well it was more the culmination of a wave that’s been building…. A deeper recognition of how much I live in fear…. It’s not an unreasonable emotion to have at the moment in our anxiety inducing Covid situation.
Yet, over the past few days, I kept feeling this persistent nudge… ‘what if I didn’t live in fear?’ it whispered. “How would it be if I decided not to tune into fear anymore?”
I know there are hundreds of self-help books, courses and gurus that give many wonderful tools to deal with fear and I have probably used a large majority of them…
But today I had the thought ‘what if I just let go of fear and trusted instead’. This was more than a thought, it was a powerful feeling. One thing I am grateful to Covid for, is pushing me to connect so deeply with my Higher Power. God, the Great Mystery, the Divine Goddess. And now when I really let it in, I feel held.
The thought came again “what if I just completely trusted?” This time, I surrendered to it. As I did, I could feel a splintering and shattering of patterns around me, like an invisible, web-like, glass prison falling to pieces. A new sense of freedom emerged.
Letting go of fear doesn’t mean that I stick my head in the sand or become ‘delusionally optimistic’. It allows me to trust completely in Source and in my own innate Divine Power.
This Deep Trust is different to anything I have yet experienced.
I am no stranger to the art of manifestation and law of attraction and have used these successfully in my life many times.
When Covid first graced the news at the beginning of this year, I decided to hold instantly to the thought that I would not get sick, nor would ‘I be a carrier’. I knew this deep down to my core. This is a manifestation technique. It was easy for me to trust this. Having worked in the past, as a holistic health practitioner and studied the immune system for 15 years I had a lot of knowledge on my side. I stocked up on vitamin D, various natural immune boosters and remedies. I took practical action. But then, as a keyworker, I went out to work with the bereaved holding no fear whatsoever for myself or that I would harm others. I trusted my intuition to guide me and if a situation felt wrong I would walk away. This felt controllable and within my sphere of influence.
My recent fears however have been triggered by scenes of police brutality in Australia, people harassed in their homes for posting opinions on Facebook. Elderly women surrounded by 4 or 5 uniformed men and being berated for I’m not sure what. My fearful ego started urgently running a narrative in my head ‘what if that happens here?’ Recently there has been talk of the military on our streets in the UK. Of course, these are all things far outside my control. But my fearful ego started to scream at me, showing me technicoloured visions of a dystopian future.
My fight/ flight and survival instinct responded - it fired up to ‘code red’.
And yet my logical mind realised that none of that is here. At least not yet, and maybe never.
Over the years, my brilliant imagination has been used in this way many, many times, dreaming up vivid horrors for me to live through. And I’ve used tools and techniques taught to me by various mentors and gurus to ‘talk myself off the ledge’ as it were.
But today, none of that was needed. Because as I let that Deep Trust enfold me in its loving arms, I knew that whatever happens, I will be guided and shown the way through. I felt deeply protected. I knew that as long as I stay connected and continue to listen to the Sacred voice within, all will be well.
We’re here to follow our sacred paths and fulfil our divine missions. That’s the most important task. Miracles do happen. Strange coincidences and synchronicities line up when we’re living in flow. That will be the case whether we’re living in a totalitarian society or a democratic one. A Utopia or Dystopia. As long as we don’t let fear blot out the connection.
And so today I will listen to my heart. I will take inspired action; just small steps within my sphere of influence. And then I will let go of the outcome.
Today I will continue with my Divine Mission.
Today I will Trust.
Are you feeling controlled by fear? Have you ever experienced Deep Trust? I’d love to hear your experiences. Drop me a message in the comments